Matthew Crawford

Matthew is a Deacon. This year he is a member of the Marist Community at St Mary of the Angels in Wellington. He is exercising ministry as a Deacon some of the time and working to gain a teaching qualification. He has completed the theology papers required prior to ordination as a priest

I am the second youngest in a family of 5. I grew up in a strong Catholic family and was blessed with all the opportunities that life could offer. However as soon as I got the chance I turned my back on my faith and went out to try and grab everything that life could offer me.

My time at high school and university were basically spent following the crowd and leading a life that was aimed at sucking pleasure out of all that I did. My outlook on life was very much centred on myself
When I travelled overseas I began to get a faint sense of God trying to break down all the walls I had built up around myself I started to pray the rosary again and in very small ways tried to let God in.
I began to realise how empty life is when you place yourself at the centre

When I arrived back in New Zealand I felt it was time to try and put God first and make an attempt to lead a life more pleasing to God. What a shock I got when I realised all I had to do was ask God to help me and he would give me everything I needed.

During this time I started to feel God calling me to give my life to him, I was just unsure what he wanted of me. When my sister phoned me out of the blue one day and asked me had I ever considered becoming a priest, I felt a little jolt of what can only be described as clarity.

The next day I was at my computer and was reading different peoples' experiences of priesthood, and all that it entailed, and I was overwhelmed with the power of God's presence, it felt as if God was smiling at me.
So much of my life and my personality traits made sense right at that moment. God had been calling me from the very beginning and the reason he allowed me to wallow in sin for a big part of my life, was because he knew that I had to experience it to understand its emptiness.

After spending the last two years in Mexico on pastoral placement, I am now entering my 8th and last year at Marist Seminary.  I look back on these last 8 years with a real sense of wonder at how good the Lord has been to me.  Despite all my shortcomings and failures Jesus continues to call me and invites me to hand everything over to him.  I look to Mary and beg her intercession so that I might have the courage to, like her, say YES to God. 

Come to me all you who labour and are heavy burdened and I will give you rest.